One of my secret talents is that I can do a really good, obnoxious, piercing witch laugh. (My husband can attest to the piercing part--he declares it should only be done outdoors and when he isn't around.) I decided to record this laugh for all y'all to hear (note: the recording is of low quality). Before you listen, though, please realize it is loud and piercing, so you might want to adjust the sound volume. Here it is: Joy's Witch Laugh.
Halloween is one of my favorite holidays (always has been since I was a young kid). I love the spookiness and electricity surrounding the day. As a middle-school student I voraciously read books in the library about ghost stories. If you have any personal ghost stories, please share them with me!
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Mindfulness Message
“We often look elsewhere for what we have already; we project. We turn to others to give us a level of acceptance we can only give ourselves. We invest people, institutions, situations, and things with certain attributes that they might indeed have, yet which do not belong solely to them but to us as well. We attribute to others flaws we need to come to terms with in our own character; we credit others with fine qualities that we are unable to acknowledge in ourselves; we turn to institutions and leaders to give us answers, to rescue us from confusion and helplessness, to bring a level of meaning and order that can come only from within. Every time we reclaim some of our own energies, stop projecting onto others attributes of ourselves, we become more whole, more present.”
Jill Mellick
(From “Coming Home to Myself”)
Jill Mellick
(From “Coming Home to Myself”)
Quick Comment about Comments
Please know that I closely read all the comments left on my blog. In the last couple weeks, I chose two particular comments to which I wrote long responses, but this doesn't mean I don't read and value the other comments that have been left on the blog. The bottom line is that I appreciate (and thoughtfully read) all comments left for me (positive, negative, or neutral), and I encourage others to comment on the comments (as well as on my blog).
Monday, October 27, 2008
Response Part 2 -- Practical Suggestions
This is the second part of a response to a particular set of questions from a student:
"But how can we as students make time for ourselves while the everyday demands only grow and grow? I can work on being "good enough" for myself (just by being me), but how do I handle the message given to us from graduate schools and employers that we aren't quite good enough for them? How is it possible to compete with our peers if we prioritize our own well-being? Do you think it is possible?"
In my last response I gave some true confessions about my own life. In this post, I'll offer some practical suggestions on this topic (for students and people, in general). Before I put in my two cents, though, I want to quote my wise friend and colleague, Jeff Witmer, who already wrote a comment on my blog in response to the student:
"The best advice that I've read on this is a quote from Tom Stoppard: 'Don't chase success; if you chase excellence, success will chase you.' Thus, to the question 'How is it possible to compete with our peers if we prioritize our own well-being?' I would say that you should be competing (if you want to use that word) with yourself, not with others.Think about what you want, what motivates you, where your talent lies, and do that thing, with joy and enthusiasm. We often see people who _appear_ to be good at everything, or at least at many things. But the world actually rewards the person who does one thing extremely well, not the person who does many things reasonably well. And the person who loves something and does it well achieves fulfillment -- which is well beyond contentment and is even beyond happiness."
I include this quote from Jeff, because I'm in complete agreement. What I encourage students to do is really think (not just with the mind but with the heart) about what they enjoy, what they have aptitude for, what gets them excited, etc. For example, do you (this is a general "you") want to attend medical school, because one of your parents is a doctor (or you have a whole family of doctors) or because it seems like a job that is well-respected by society or because you're not sure what else to do or because you're passionate about the work and the potential of helping people? If it's the last reason, then medical school is an appropriate priority and studying hard to learn material and earn high grades might take up much of (but certainly not all) of your time in college. If it's one of the other reasons, then you should really rethink the whole medical school idea (which will then potentially shift your priorities and where you spend your time).
I understand that our current society has (sometimes unreasonably) high standards for amount of hours worked, number of achievements accumulated, etc. But often the expectations are different for each career field. I already mentioned that medical schools place great emphasis on grades and GMAT scores. In another job field, the emphasis might be on co-curricular experiences (e.g., leadership positions, volunteer activities, summer internships), yet not quite so much on ending GPA. That is, I think there are few post-college opportunities where society expects you to excel completely in every single aspect of your life. So the important exercise for students is to think deeply about where they'd like to be after college (both personally and career-wise) and then create appropriate priorities while in college. And this is a process you can continue for your whole life. [Note: I realize there are some professions that really ask you t0 highly excel in many areas (e.g., astronaut, brain surgeon, high political office). In these cases, it might not be feasible to have a large amount of "balance" in your life. But that is a choice you can make with their eyes wide open. Do you love the work so much that you can sacrifice balance in other areas?]
So here are my wrap-up points:
1. Take time to reflect on what you are passionate about and what you value the most (personally, academically, professionally, spiritually, etc.). Then take steps to prioritize that (or those) thing(s). It's possible that these steps might not position you for a job in an uber-competitive field (but then you should rethink whether that field meshes with what matters the most to you).
2. There will be times when you feel out of balance and overwhelmed (we all do), but work to make these only short periods of time (if the overwhelm lasts too long, then it becomes unhealthful and makes you inefficient). Have some "check in" procedure as your compass (e.g., journaling, talking with a close friend).
3. This Gandhi quote is sometimes overused, but it's still a good one: "Be the change you want to see in the world." Once you get into this work society that has such high expectations (and that doesn't necessarily value wellness, balance, and mental health) you can help make the changes. You can value your own personal time and respect that of others. You can change the expectations placed on others (and on yourself). This is how change happens--one person at a time. I know this sounds a bit pie-in-the-sky, but I really, really believe it, and I'd love to convince others to believe it, too.
"But how can we as students make time for ourselves while the everyday demands only grow and grow? I can work on being "good enough" for myself (just by being me), but how do I handle the message given to us from graduate schools and employers that we aren't quite good enough for them? How is it possible to compete with our peers if we prioritize our own well-being? Do you think it is possible?"
In my last response I gave some true confessions about my own life. In this post, I'll offer some practical suggestions on this topic (for students and people, in general). Before I put in my two cents, though, I want to quote my wise friend and colleague, Jeff Witmer, who already wrote a comment on my blog in response to the student:
"The best advice that I've read on this is a quote from Tom Stoppard: 'Don't chase success; if you chase excellence, success will chase you.' Thus, to the question 'How is it possible to compete with our peers if we prioritize our own well-being?' I would say that you should be competing (if you want to use that word) with yourself, not with others.Think about what you want, what motivates you, where your talent lies, and do that thing, with joy and enthusiasm. We often see people who _appear_ to be good at everything, or at least at many things. But the world actually rewards the person who does one thing extremely well, not the person who does many things reasonably well. And the person who loves something and does it well achieves fulfillment -- which is well beyond contentment and is even beyond happiness."
I include this quote from Jeff, because I'm in complete agreement. What I encourage students to do is really think (not just with the mind but with the heart) about what they enjoy, what they have aptitude for, what gets them excited, etc. For example, do you (this is a general "you") want to attend medical school, because one of your parents is a doctor (or you have a whole family of doctors) or because it seems like a job that is well-respected by society or because you're not sure what else to do or because you're passionate about the work and the potential of helping people? If it's the last reason, then medical school is an appropriate priority and studying hard to learn material and earn high grades might take up much of (but certainly not all) of your time in college. If it's one of the other reasons, then you should really rethink the whole medical school idea (which will then potentially shift your priorities and where you spend your time).
I understand that our current society has (sometimes unreasonably) high standards for amount of hours worked, number of achievements accumulated, etc. But often the expectations are different for each career field. I already mentioned that medical schools place great emphasis on grades and GMAT scores. In another job field, the emphasis might be on co-curricular experiences (e.g., leadership positions, volunteer activities, summer internships), yet not quite so much on ending GPA. That is, I think there are few post-college opportunities where society expects you to excel completely in every single aspect of your life. So the important exercise for students is to think deeply about where they'd like to be after college (both personally and career-wise) and then create appropriate priorities while in college. And this is a process you can continue for your whole life. [Note: I realize there are some professions that really ask you t0 highly excel in many areas (e.g., astronaut, brain surgeon, high political office). In these cases, it might not be feasible to have a large amount of "balance" in your life. But that is a choice you can make with their eyes wide open. Do you love the work so much that you can sacrifice balance in other areas?]
So here are my wrap-up points:
1. Take time to reflect on what you are passionate about and what you value the most (personally, academically, professionally, spiritually, etc.). Then take steps to prioritize that (or those) thing(s). It's possible that these steps might not position you for a job in an uber-competitive field (but then you should rethink whether that field meshes with what matters the most to you).
2. There will be times when you feel out of balance and overwhelmed (we all do), but work to make these only short periods of time (if the overwhelm lasts too long, then it becomes unhealthful and makes you inefficient). Have some "check in" procedure as your compass (e.g., journaling, talking with a close friend).
3. This Gandhi quote is sometimes overused, but it's still a good one: "Be the change you want to see in the world." Once you get into this work society that has such high expectations (and that doesn't necessarily value wellness, balance, and mental health) you can help make the changes. You can value your own personal time and respect that of others. You can change the expectations placed on others (and on yourself). This is how change happens--one person at a time. I know this sounds a bit pie-in-the-sky, but I really, really believe it, and I'd love to convince others to believe it, too.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Response Part 1 -- True Confessions
As referenced in my last post, a student made some insightful comments and asked some good questions:
"But how can we as students make time for ourselves while the everyday demands only grow and grow? I can work on being 'good enough' for myself (just by being me), but how do I handle the message given to us from graduate schools and employers that we aren't quite good enough for them? How is it possible to compete with our peers if we prioritize our own well-being? Do you think it is possible?"
I've decided to address these questions in two parts (which may turn into more parts as I keep thinking about it). First of all, I must make some confessions. I have been a classic "overachiever" my whole life. In high school I graduated at the top of my class, while also playing 3 sports, singing in the choir, participating in drama, and being on the student council. I earned a full-ride athletic scholarship to Indiana University, where I played volleyball and graduated Phi Beta Kappa with a mathematics degree. Then I went onto the University of Iowa to earn my PhD in statistics, before landing this job at Lawrence. Finally, I became an active member of the Lawrence community, working hard for and earning tenure a few years ago. All while being the best friend, wife, and family member I could be and always having a smile on my face. Phew!
So I fully confess that while in college, I was completely on the hamster-wheel/treadmill of life. I did not truly love myself and I pushed myself very hard. Slowly, at the end of college and the beginning of graduate school, I realized that I simply couldn't keep up the pace. Then began my (sometimes slow) personal, self-reflective, spiritual path that continues today. And my next true confession is that I didn't fully realize I could get off the hamster-wheel until I received tenure here at Lawrence (the "last" big hurdle--although I'm kidding myself if I think I can ever do "one last thing" and then be happy). Somehow, after having the security of tenure and having walked down my personal path long enough, I began to let go of my clinging to "doing/achieving" mode.
Here I am, at 39 years old, having done very hard personal and self-reflective work to get to my current place, yet I'm asking college students to consider and apply the very insights it took me years to find. Is this fair? Is this reasonable?
My thinking is that I'd love for students to at least consider these possibilities (e.g., non-doing, loving-kindness, self-reflection). I'd love for these ideas to plant at least some small seeds inside the hearts, minds, and souls of students (and all people). Perhaps these seeds will bloom now or perhaps they'll sit dormant until a more appropriate time to bloom. I think I would have benefited greatly from hearing these possibilities while I was in college. Might then I have changed my treadmill attitude sooner? Perhaps, perhaps not. Might I have relaxed my ego-driven need for success? Perhaps, perhaps not. Might I have not gotten my PhD or not gotten tenure? Perhaps, perhaps not. Might I have changed my career or life path? Perhaps, but would it really matter, as long as I was authentic and true to myself and happy?
Another true confession is that I still, daily, work on awareness and breathwork and experiencing the moment. Some days I completely lose myself in my job; I don't take a deep breath all day. Other days I'm present for many of my experiences and I inhabit my body in a mindful way. Other days are in-between.
As an example, on Friday afternoon, I needed to finish some work, but I really longed to blog (this blog has been the most fun creatively I've had in a long time). By the time I got to my blog it was 5:15 (at the end of what was a long day). If I had taken a moment to truly check in with myself, I would have realized that I was exhausted and it would have been a more healthful choice for me to simply go home and relax, rather than blog. Instead, I let my "to-do" mind drive me (I planned to write in my blog and it was going to be fun, so dammit I was going to blog). I tried to log on to blogspot, only to be told there was very heavy usage and I must try back again. I kept re-trying for the next 10 minutes, getting crankier and crankier. Finally, I just sat back from my computer and started laughing. My wonderful creative outlet had been taken over by extreme "doing" mode. Even if I had gotten onto blogspot, I wasn't in the appropriate emotional state from which I could write creatively and effectively. There I was, after all my hard personal work, right back on the treadmill of life. And so it goes. This is not something that changes overnight or ever changes permanently. Awareness is a constant (yet changing) work in progress.
"But how can we as students make time for ourselves while the everyday demands only grow and grow? I can work on being 'good enough' for myself (just by being me), but how do I handle the message given to us from graduate schools and employers that we aren't quite good enough for them? How is it possible to compete with our peers if we prioritize our own well-being? Do you think it is possible?"
I've decided to address these questions in two parts (which may turn into more parts as I keep thinking about it). First of all, I must make some confessions. I have been a classic "overachiever" my whole life. In high school I graduated at the top of my class, while also playing 3 sports, singing in the choir, participating in drama, and being on the student council. I earned a full-ride athletic scholarship to Indiana University, where I played volleyball and graduated Phi Beta Kappa with a mathematics degree. Then I went onto the University of Iowa to earn my PhD in statistics, before landing this job at Lawrence. Finally, I became an active member of the Lawrence community, working hard for and earning tenure a few years ago. All while being the best friend, wife, and family member I could be and always having a smile on my face. Phew!
So I fully confess that while in college, I was completely on the hamster-wheel/treadmill of life. I did not truly love myself and I pushed myself very hard. Slowly, at the end of college and the beginning of graduate school, I realized that I simply couldn't keep up the pace. Then began my (sometimes slow) personal, self-reflective, spiritual path that continues today. And my next true confession is that I didn't fully realize I could get off the hamster-wheel until I received tenure here at Lawrence (the "last" big hurdle--although I'm kidding myself if I think I can ever do "one last thing" and then be happy). Somehow, after having the security of tenure and having walked down my personal path long enough, I began to let go of my clinging to "doing/achieving" mode.
Here I am, at 39 years old, having done very hard personal and self-reflective work to get to my current place, yet I'm asking college students to consider and apply the very insights it took me years to find. Is this fair? Is this reasonable?
My thinking is that I'd love for students to at least consider these possibilities (e.g., non-doing, loving-kindness, self-reflection). I'd love for these ideas to plant at least some small seeds inside the hearts, minds, and souls of students (and all people). Perhaps these seeds will bloom now or perhaps they'll sit dormant until a more appropriate time to bloom. I think I would have benefited greatly from hearing these possibilities while I was in college. Might then I have changed my treadmill attitude sooner? Perhaps, perhaps not. Might I have relaxed my ego-driven need for success? Perhaps, perhaps not. Might I have not gotten my PhD or not gotten tenure? Perhaps, perhaps not. Might I have changed my career or life path? Perhaps, but would it really matter, as long as I was authentic and true to myself and happy?
Another true confession is that I still, daily, work on awareness and breathwork and experiencing the moment. Some days I completely lose myself in my job; I don't take a deep breath all day. Other days I'm present for many of my experiences and I inhabit my body in a mindful way. Other days are in-between.
As an example, on Friday afternoon, I needed to finish some work, but I really longed to blog (this blog has been the most fun creatively I've had in a long time). By the time I got to my blog it was 5:15 (at the end of what was a long day). If I had taken a moment to truly check in with myself, I would have realized that I was exhausted and it would have been a more healthful choice for me to simply go home and relax, rather than blog. Instead, I let my "to-do" mind drive me (I planned to write in my blog and it was going to be fun, so dammit I was going to blog). I tried to log on to blogspot, only to be told there was very heavy usage and I must try back again. I kept re-trying for the next 10 minutes, getting crankier and crankier. Finally, I just sat back from my computer and started laughing. My wonderful creative outlet had been taken over by extreme "doing" mode. Even if I had gotten onto blogspot, I wasn't in the appropriate emotional state from which I could write creatively and effectively. There I was, after all my hard personal work, right back on the treadmill of life. And so it goes. This is not something that changes overnight or ever changes permanently. Awareness is a constant (yet changing) work in progress.
Insightful Student Comment
After my post "Why a Class Day Off Isn't Necessarily the answer," a student left an insightful and heartfelt comment. If you haven't yet seen the comments made about that particular post, please go read them now. I'm pleased to see students responding to my posts, but I must admit that this particular comment spoke to me deeply. It breaks my heart to think of all the pressures students face while preparing for life in a society that currently values "standard" forms of "high" achievement. (See my Baccaulareate Address for my thoughts on redefining success and achievement.) I've thought a lot about this particular student comment, and I think I'll respond in a sequence of posts.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Happy Pause--Cute Baby Animals
Who can possibly resist cute baby animals? http://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/us_world/Zoo_Babies.html
Just thought I'd give y'all (and myself) a brief, happy pause to look at cute animals.
PS I'm not sure how long this weblink will stay "live," so if you get to this post at a later date there might not be cute animals, but you can still imagine the warm, fuzzy feeling they would have given you.
Just thought I'd give y'all (and myself) a brief, happy pause to look at cute animals.
PS I'm not sure how long this weblink will stay "live," so if you get to this post at a later date there might not be cute animals, but you can still imagine the warm, fuzzy feeling they would have given you.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Why a Class Day Off Isn't Necessarily the Answer
In response to my "10-Week Push" blog entry, anonymous (whom I assume is a student) wrote: "You should give us a day off then." I certainly welcome any and all comments, and I appreciate this one. It made me think about why a class day off is really more of a band-aid (or Neosporin, which temporarily relieves pain), rather than a long-term fix.
Sure, a day off is nice for everyone. It provides a bit of ease in everyone's very busy schedules. Sometimes I do decide to give a day off (or at least let the class out quite a bit early). Other times, I don't, because I'd rather teach the material I love (at a reasonable pace).
Rather than the day-off approach, I suggest we all reorient our priorities (which will be different from individual to individual). Some students might prioritize all their courses and the complete understanding of each concept. Other students might put reasonable work into their courses, but prioritize their extra-curricular activities (e.g., ensembles, athletics, student groups, volunteerism). Still other students might prioritize certain courses within their major or special area of interest. And I hope we can all prioritize at least some minimal requirements that keep us balanced (e.g., exercise, journaling, quiet time, reflection, laughing with friends).
As a teacher, I don't judge the priorities of any given student. That is, I don't expect each student to spend every waking moment thinking about and studying statistics. I know my course won't be a priority for some students and that's okay. But if it is a priority, then I will do everything in my power to help a student understand the material.
I think we often get caught up in the idea that we can "do it all." That we can get As in all our courses while (for example) being an RLA and chairing a student committee and singing in the choir and having a healthy social life and exercising and sleeping 8 hours a night and... (you get the picture). A day off from class doesn't help with this general mentality. It's the mentality that I'd like to see change (both at an individual and a societal level). Here's the hard truth: none of us can really "do it all," and if we try there are typically negative consequences on our mental and physical health.
So, I agree that breaks are necessary--we must have some time to rest and rejuvenate. But is a day off from class the best answer to the 10-Week Push? Perhaps, but only as a quick, temporary fix. The bigger-picture fix is for all of us (students, faculty, and staff) to reflect thoughtfully on our lives and our priorities and our own needs for balance (and recognize that we can't do it all and that's okay - it doesn't mean we're bad people, it simply means we know and value what is important to each of us individually).
Right now, I give you all permission to unabashedly not do it all. And I will challenge myself to do the same. The reason I can write so much on this topic is that I've spent much of my life under the misperception that I really can get everything done and done well. But this drive doesn't come from a centered, authentic self. It comes directly from ego, telling us that if we just do more and push harder, then we'll be happy. But why not be happy right now, in this moment?
Sure, a day off is nice for everyone. It provides a bit of ease in everyone's very busy schedules. Sometimes I do decide to give a day off (or at least let the class out quite a bit early). Other times, I don't, because I'd rather teach the material I love (at a reasonable pace).
Rather than the day-off approach, I suggest we all reorient our priorities (which will be different from individual to individual). Some students might prioritize all their courses and the complete understanding of each concept. Other students might put reasonable work into their courses, but prioritize their extra-curricular activities (e.g., ensembles, athletics, student groups, volunteerism). Still other students might prioritize certain courses within their major or special area of interest. And I hope we can all prioritize at least some minimal requirements that keep us balanced (e.g., exercise, journaling, quiet time, reflection, laughing with friends).
As a teacher, I don't judge the priorities of any given student. That is, I don't expect each student to spend every waking moment thinking about and studying statistics. I know my course won't be a priority for some students and that's okay. But if it is a priority, then I will do everything in my power to help a student understand the material.
I think we often get caught up in the idea that we can "do it all." That we can get As in all our courses while (for example) being an RLA and chairing a student committee and singing in the choir and having a healthy social life and exercising and sleeping 8 hours a night and... (you get the picture). A day off from class doesn't help with this general mentality. It's the mentality that I'd like to see change (both at an individual and a societal level). Here's the hard truth: none of us can really "do it all," and if we try there are typically negative consequences on our mental and physical health.
So, I agree that breaks are necessary--we must have some time to rest and rejuvenate. But is a day off from class the best answer to the 10-Week Push? Perhaps, but only as a quick, temporary fix. The bigger-picture fix is for all of us (students, faculty, and staff) to reflect thoughtfully on our lives and our priorities and our own needs for balance (and recognize that we can't do it all and that's okay - it doesn't mean we're bad people, it simply means we know and value what is important to each of us individually).
Right now, I give you all permission to unabashedly not do it all. And I will challenge myself to do the same. The reason I can write so much on this topic is that I've spent much of my life under the misperception that I really can get everything done and done well. But this drive doesn't come from a centered, authentic self. It comes directly from ego, telling us that if we just do more and push harder, then we'll be happy. But why not be happy right now, in this moment?
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Explanation of Mindfulness Messages
I read a lot of books on meditation, Buddhist dharma, self-reflection, the spiritual and personal journey, and living life fully. From these books, I've collected a number of quotations that have spoken to me (in one particular moment of my life or in all moments of my life). I periodically send these "Mindfulness Messages" to an email list of about 50 of my friends. I thought it worthwhile to also occasionally post these to my blog (where the quotation is the only blog entry). If you're a Daily Dish follower, you can think of these as "Mental Health Breaks" or if you're a Daily Show follower, you can think of these as "Moments of Zen."
Here's the first of my Mindfulness Message posts:
“There are so few empty pages in my engagement pad, or empty hours in the day, or empty rooms in my life in which to stand alone and find myself. Too many activities, and people, and things. Too many worthy activities, valuable things and interesting people. For it is not merely the trivial which clutters our lives but the important as well. We can have a surfeit of treasures—an excess of shells, where one or two would be significant.”
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
(From Gift from the Sea)
Here's the first of my Mindfulness Message posts:
“There are so few empty pages in my engagement pad, or empty hours in the day, or empty rooms in my life in which to stand alone and find myself. Too many activities, and people, and things. Too many worthy activities, valuable things and interesting people. For it is not merely the trivial which clutters our lives but the important as well. We can have a surfeit of treasures—an excess of shells, where one or two would be significant.”
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
(From Gift from the Sea)
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
The 10-Week Push
At Lawrence, our academic year consists of three 10-week terms (we meet for 70 minutes at a pop, rather than the 50 minutes at semester-calendar schools). Terms are intense for both faculty and students (although probably not as intense as the "blocks" that our colleagues at Colorado College and Cornell College teach). We hit the ground running the first day of class and often take no time to look back or look around or breathe.
The idea of covering lots of material is alluring to faculty members. Why? Because we're really enthusiastic about what we teach, and we're excited to impart this knowledge (in multiple ways) to our students. Also, because we faculty are not immune to "doing mind" (in fact, we're quite good at it), part of the coverage issue is that we simply want to cram more in and do more and feel more "accomplishment" at the end of a day or term. (Because I always look on the bright side, I think the first reason--enthusiasm and excitement--is really more of a driving factor for us faculty.)
I noticed this week that my students look exhausted--they are tired and sick and have started to feel overwhelmed by upcoming assignments and exams. Even my classroom style of jumping around and cheerleading about statistics couldn't keep them from occasionally deeply closing their eyes (and then opening them quickly). And when I take a moment to center myself and breathe, I realize that I am exhausted, too.
So this is a good time for us all to take a collective deep breath. Maybe we all have a lot more choices than we think we do. (Jennifer Louden quote: "You always have choices, especially when it feels like you don't.") Perhaps we can sneak in a little more sleep, a little more quiet time, a little less "coverage" of course material, in order to rejuvenate and ultimately be more efficient in our work.
I often need to stop myself when I look at my syllabus and see that we're lagging a bit behind. Stop myself and realize that students typically take away big ideas from my class (not all the small little details that I find particularly important). It's not that I won't mention all the details. It's just that there's no reason to push forward and cram more in simply to stay on the somewhat arbitrary schedule I set at the beginning of the term. The students are getting good stuff (well, at least I think it's all good stuff), regardless of where we end up (material-wise) in the end.
The idea of covering lots of material is alluring to faculty members. Why? Because we're really enthusiastic about what we teach, and we're excited to impart this knowledge (in multiple ways) to our students. Also, because we faculty are not immune to "doing mind" (in fact, we're quite good at it), part of the coverage issue is that we simply want to cram more in and do more and feel more "accomplishment" at the end of a day or term. (Because I always look on the bright side, I think the first reason--enthusiasm and excitement--is really more of a driving factor for us faculty.)
I noticed this week that my students look exhausted--they are tired and sick and have started to feel overwhelmed by upcoming assignments and exams. Even my classroom style of jumping around and cheerleading about statistics couldn't keep them from occasionally deeply closing their eyes (and then opening them quickly). And when I take a moment to center myself and breathe, I realize that I am exhausted, too.
So this is a good time for us all to take a collective deep breath. Maybe we all have a lot more choices than we think we do. (Jennifer Louden quote: "You always have choices, especially when it feels like you don't.") Perhaps we can sneak in a little more sleep, a little more quiet time, a little less "coverage" of course material, in order to rejuvenate and ultimately be more efficient in our work.
I often need to stop myself when I look at my syllabus and see that we're lagging a bit behind. Stop myself and realize that students typically take away big ideas from my class (not all the small little details that I find particularly important). It's not that I won't mention all the details. It's just that there's no reason to push forward and cram more in simply to stay on the somewhat arbitrary schedule I set at the beginning of the term. The students are getting good stuff (well, at least I think it's all good stuff), regardless of where we end up (material-wise) in the end.
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Stillness
My last post ended with a quote from Jon Kabat-Zinn (respected scientist, writer, and meditation teacher). This time I'll start with a quote (again from his book Full Catastrophe Living):
“Our schools do not emphasize being. We are left to sort that one out by ourselves. It is doing that is the currency of modern education. Sadly, though, it is a fragmented doing for the most part, divorced as it is from any emphasis on who is doing the doing and from what we might learn in the domain of being. So often the doing is under the pressure of time, as if we were being pushed through our lives by the pace of the world, without the luxury of stopping and taking our bearings, of knowing who is doing the doing. Awareness itself is not highly valued, nor are we taught the richness of it and how to nurture and use it.”
It is so easy to fall into "doing mode." (I work on this daily--sometimes I'm aware of it, other times I'm not.) This "doing mode" is culturally accepted (and, in fact, encouraged), so you might even feel a little guilty trying out the "being mode." Right here, right now, I give you all guilt-free permission to experiment with "being mode." Doing, busy society be damned--let's start a revolution of being.
How can you start? Perhaps simply by spending five minutes each day sitting with yourself (computers, cell phones, iPods, music all off), attending to your breath and how your body and mind are feeling (and thinking). Just checking in with yourself each day (in a still, "being" way) can be a helpful thing. You can also take mindful walks (without the iPod and without talking). Fall is a beautiful time on campus--take a short walk where you really notice the colors of the trees and the coolness of the air and the wind on your face and your breath working it's way through your body.
Without some stillness and reflection time, it's difficult to process personal issues as well as academic issues. That is, stillness can help you both personally and academically. With difficult academic topics, you often need time and space to really think (in an open, unconfined way) in order to understand. And on a personal level, it's difficult to work with your emotions, make important decisions, and follow your heart if you aren't tuned in with your body and mind through some sort of stillness/being practice.
“Our schools do not emphasize being. We are left to sort that one out by ourselves. It is doing that is the currency of modern education. Sadly, though, it is a fragmented doing for the most part, divorced as it is from any emphasis on who is doing the doing and from what we might learn in the domain of being. So often the doing is under the pressure of time, as if we were being pushed through our lives by the pace of the world, without the luxury of stopping and taking our bearings, of knowing who is doing the doing. Awareness itself is not highly valued, nor are we taught the richness of it and how to nurture and use it.”
It is so easy to fall into "doing mode." (I work on this daily--sometimes I'm aware of it, other times I'm not.) This "doing mode" is culturally accepted (and, in fact, encouraged), so you might even feel a little guilty trying out the "being mode." Right here, right now, I give you all guilt-free permission to experiment with "being mode." Doing, busy society be damned--let's start a revolution of being.
How can you start? Perhaps simply by spending five minutes each day sitting with yourself (computers, cell phones, iPods, music all off), attending to your breath and how your body and mind are feeling (and thinking). Just checking in with yourself each day (in a still, "being" way) can be a helpful thing. You can also take mindful walks (without the iPod and without talking). Fall is a beautiful time on campus--take a short walk where you really notice the colors of the trees and the coolness of the air and the wind on your face and your breath working it's way through your body.
Without some stillness and reflection time, it's difficult to process personal issues as well as academic issues. That is, stillness can help you both personally and academically. With difficult academic topics, you often need time and space to really think (in an open, unconfined way) in order to understand. And on a personal level, it's difficult to work with your emotions, make important decisions, and follow your heart if you aren't tuned in with your body and mind through some sort of stillness/being practice.
Busyness
In general, I'm concerned about the culture of busyness, both within our broader society and within the Lawrence community. Technology now easily allows for almost constant breaks in the silence: cell phones, text messaging, email, FaceBook, instant messaging, iPods (and I'm sure I'm missing many others). Furthermore our students (and faculty and staff) are involved in many, many projects at once: classes, work-study jobs, co-curricular activities, student groups, athletics, theatre and music performances, applying to graduate school, etc. These are all wonderful, enriching activities (and I encourage students to do what they love), but sometimes too much of even a good thing can be too much.
Some students can manage this busy daily schedule (some even seem to delight in it), but for many others I see a level of stress and anxiety build. An anxiety that perhaps builds slowly, so as to go unnoticed by the students ("everything is just fine"), but then eventually hits hard physically, mentally, and emotionally. And the sneaky thing about the stress/anxiety is that it really can feel like it comes out of the blue (it convinces you to keep going and pushing up until your very last fingernail is hanging off the cliff).
The key to not let the anxiety "sneak up" is to try your very best to be self-aware--aware of your body, of your breath, of your thoughts, of your emotions. But if there's only busyness and no stillness in your life, then it's very difficult to be self-aware. This is why I'm concerned with the culture of busyness.
I'll end with a quote by Jon Kabat-Zinn, who is a well-respected scientist (professor of medicine), writer, and meditation teacher. This quote is from his book Full Catastrophe Living:
“Simplifying our lives in even little ways can make a big difference. If you fill up all your time, you won’t have any. And you probably won’t even be aware of why you don’t. Simplifying may mean prioritizing the things that you have to and want do to and, at the same time, consciously choosing to give certain things up. It may mean learning to say no sometimes, even to things you want to do or to people you care about and want to help so that you are protecting and preserving some space for silence, for non-doing.”
Some students can manage this busy daily schedule (some even seem to delight in it), but for many others I see a level of stress and anxiety build. An anxiety that perhaps builds slowly, so as to go unnoticed by the students ("everything is just fine"), but then eventually hits hard physically, mentally, and emotionally. And the sneaky thing about the stress/anxiety is that it really can feel like it comes out of the blue (it convinces you to keep going and pushing up until your very last fingernail is hanging off the cliff).
The key to not let the anxiety "sneak up" is to try your very best to be self-aware--aware of your body, of your breath, of your thoughts, of your emotions. But if there's only busyness and no stillness in your life, then it's very difficult to be self-aware. This is why I'm concerned with the culture of busyness.
I'll end with a quote by Jon Kabat-Zinn, who is a well-respected scientist (professor of medicine), writer, and meditation teacher. This quote is from his book Full Catastrophe Living:
“Simplifying our lives in even little ways can make a big difference. If you fill up all your time, you won’t have any. And you probably won’t even be aware of why you don’t. Simplifying may mean prioritizing the things that you have to and want do to and, at the same time, consciously choosing to give certain things up. It may mean learning to say no sometimes, even to things you want to do or to people you care about and want to help so that you are protecting and preserving some space for silence, for non-doing.”
Monday, October 06, 2008
Why Not Experiment with Loving-Kindness?
At dinner last night, my husband (who I'll refer to by name--Mark--from now on in this blog) talked with me about my last blog post--particularly about his perceived (and yet unresolved) dissonance between loving-kindness/non-judgement/mindfulness and the ability to actually "get things done" (e.g., move society forward through medical breakthroughs, etc.). Per usual, Mark makes an excellent point. (He's always getting me to think about things in new ways and to really defend my position--a quality I love about him.)
So, if we all (as a society) really worked on loving ourselves (deeply, not in a surface, egotistical way) as well as loving others, would we all just turn into coach potatoes (simply eating Cheetos, watching TV, and laying on the couch all day, every day)? My answer is "no." I think there is space for loving-kindness and achievement (that is, "getting things done"). It's just that the creative work then comes from a much more positive place in yourself (rather than a negative place of "I'm not good enough, so I better get this done"). And I think we'd enjoy the work more and be more efficient.
So my challenge to y'all (including Mark) is to give this a try. Practice motivating yourself not out of self-hatred (or embarrassment or judgment), but out of self-love and loving-kindness. See what happens. (By the way, this is an experiment that takes quite a while, as the journey is a difficult one.) Do you still get things done? Do you still have ideas and creativity and motivation? If so, great! If not (and I'd like to talk with you more about how this didn't work), then you can simply write me off as some kooky (but well-meaning) stats professor with rose-colored glasses.
So, if we all (as a society) really worked on loving ourselves (deeply, not in a surface, egotistical way) as well as loving others, would we all just turn into coach potatoes (simply eating Cheetos, watching TV, and laying on the couch all day, every day)? My answer is "no." I think there is space for loving-kindness and achievement (that is, "getting things done"). It's just that the creative work then comes from a much more positive place in yourself (rather than a negative place of "I'm not good enough, so I better get this done"). And I think we'd enjoy the work more and be more efficient.
So my challenge to y'all (including Mark) is to give this a try. Practice motivating yourself not out of self-hatred (or embarrassment or judgment), but out of self-love and loving-kindness. See what happens. (By the way, this is an experiment that takes quite a while, as the journey is a difficult one.) Do you still get things done? Do you still have ideas and creativity and motivation? If so, great! If not (and I'd like to talk with you more about how this didn't work), then you can simply write me off as some kooky (but well-meaning) stats professor with rose-colored glasses.
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Grades and Misplaced Self-Worth
In the past couple years, I've explicitly talked with my students about (and now include in my syllabus) the important fact that they are not their grades. That is, their self-worth is not attached to a grade they get on a particular test or paper, or in a class, or even in their GPA at the end of college. In fact, their self-worth is not tied to any external achievements. They are all good, lovable people, just as they are. This is an important point for all of us to remember (I still sometimes struggle by equating myself with my job as a teacher and judging myself if I make a mis-step).
Does this mean students shouldn't care about learning or preparing for assignments? Of course not. For students who really want to be in college, learning is the key (learning both in and out of the classroom). And I will do all I can to encourage learning and to help students learn concepts and ideas (statistical ideas, in my case).
But it's important for college students (any students) to realize that their self-worth, their soul, their goodness is not tied to performance. Learn, learn, learn, yes! But don't create anxiety and extra pressure by tying personal goodness to the learning process. This is, of course, easier said than done. Unfortunately, there are messages throughout society that people are equated to outcomes (if you're not quite "good enough," then you can buy some new lotion or gadget or workout equipment to improve yourself). Furthermore, there are messages within academics that students are defined by their achievement in the classroom (GPAs "needed" for graduate school, constant comparison with other students, explicit messages from professors and advisors that students "aren't good enough" to make it through a particular class).
Let's stop the madness! Let's stop thinking of our students as floating brains in our classrooms with no other interests, commitments, talents, and goodness. Let's encourage them to learn for learning's sake, yet to believe deep within themselves that they are good people, regardless of outcomes. Yes, we must assign grades, but, no, we don't have to add judgment on top of that. Let's give students room to learn, struggle, fail, prioritize, and grow by being supportive, not judgmental. Let's model for students that personal growth and balance are important steps along the life path.
Wow - that got me worked up a little, didn't it? It's just that I feel so passionately about this. Most of these college students feel so many different pressures at the very same time they are trying to find themselves and their voices. If we, as teachers, can replace some judgment with compassion, then we are doing our students a great service.
Does this mean students shouldn't care about learning or preparing for assignments? Of course not. For students who really want to be in college, learning is the key (learning both in and out of the classroom). And I will do all I can to encourage learning and to help students learn concepts and ideas (statistical ideas, in my case).
But it's important for college students (any students) to realize that their self-worth, their soul, their goodness is not tied to performance. Learn, learn, learn, yes! But don't create anxiety and extra pressure by tying personal goodness to the learning process. This is, of course, easier said than done. Unfortunately, there are messages throughout society that people are equated to outcomes (if you're not quite "good enough," then you can buy some new lotion or gadget or workout equipment to improve yourself). Furthermore, there are messages within academics that students are defined by their achievement in the classroom (GPAs "needed" for graduate school, constant comparison with other students, explicit messages from professors and advisors that students "aren't good enough" to make it through a particular class).
Let's stop the madness! Let's stop thinking of our students as floating brains in our classrooms with no other interests, commitments, talents, and goodness. Let's encourage them to learn for learning's sake, yet to believe deep within themselves that they are good people, regardless of outcomes. Yes, we must assign grades, but, no, we don't have to add judgment on top of that. Let's give students room to learn, struggle, fail, prioritize, and grow by being supportive, not judgmental. Let's model for students that personal growth and balance are important steps along the life path.
Wow - that got me worked up a little, didn't it? It's just that I feel so passionately about this. Most of these college students feel so many different pressures at the very same time they are trying to find themselves and their voices. If we, as teachers, can replace some judgment with compassion, then we are doing our students a great service.
Baccalaureate Address
I was honored and blessed to be asked by last year's senior class officers to give the Baccalaureate Address (a speech given the day before graduation). It was personally and creatively fulfilling to talk with the students in a big forum about life issues (since I typically only get to do that on the topic of statistics). My address was called "Connect, Listen, and Be Kind," and, if interested, you can read it on my website: http://www.lawrence.edu/fast/jordanj/baccalaureate.html
Blog Revamp
It's been three years since I started this blog, and about 2.5 years since I've written a post. What stopped me? Well, the busyness of life as a professor (not quite having the time after each class to "blog my notes"), and, to be honest, my lack of interest in the particular subject matter of my initial blog.
Yes, I'm still interested in teaching statistics (in fact, I can think of no better job--I love thinking creatively about teaching and working with students). But now I'm equally interested in working with students not just on statistics material, but on life material. How can they healthfully find their way through our culture of busyness?
So, I may post about teaching a particular statistics topic, or about a neat occurrence in class, or an interesting conversation with a student, or about teaching in general, or simply about life (I have lots of life musings). And we'll see if this blog revamp gets to me to post more often.
Yes, I'm still interested in teaching statistics (in fact, I can think of no better job--I love thinking creatively about teaching and working with students). But now I'm equally interested in working with students not just on statistics material, but on life material. How can they healthfully find their way through our culture of busyness?
So, I may post about teaching a particular statistics topic, or about a neat occurrence in class, or an interesting conversation with a student, or about teaching in general, or simply about life (I have lots of life musings). And we'll see if this blog revamp gets to me to post more often.
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